Scars
by xox-cass-xox
Summary: End of Season 1 Start of Season 2...When Summer's stepmother dies, her father takes his anger out on his daughter. Without Seth there for her to run to, Summer discovers she needs him more than she thought...
1. I Tear My Heart Open

**Disclaimer: **Josh Schwartz & FOX own the O.C. not me. And I don't own Scars either, that belongs to Papa Roach.

**Chapter 1: I Tear My Heart Open**

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It felt like it had been happening all her life, when in reality it had only been a short amount of time. In the back of her mind there were memories of better times, when her mother was around and her father was happy. When her mother left when she was nine, her father began to drink every night. It continued for a few years; he would go to work, come home late at night drunk, and go to bed. She was ignored and he seemed to have forgotten she existed.

Then he met Bridget. Neil married her and seemed to become happy. The drinking had stopped and he became a loving person again. He paid attention to her again and acted like the father she thought she had lost.

Then, early this summer, Bridget died during an experimental surgery. Her dad went back to drinking, but this time it was even worse. At the start it was just him being a bit rough with her. Then it turned into full-out beatings. He started drinking even more every night, sometimes he wouldn't even come home. When he did, she just tried to make herself as scarce as possible. He would usually come for her, finding her hiding in her room, and use her as a release for his anger.

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She woke up in the middle of the night, on the floor of her bedroom, head throbbing with pain. She reached her hand up to touch her face and found blood on her fingers when she pulled her arm back. The events of earlier came rushing back to her:

_Summer heard the front door open downstairs and the sound of her father's heavy footsteps walking up the stairs. She quickly ran to the closet and closed the door. The door opened and Summer held her breath, hoping her father would think she was out._

"_Summer!" she heard him call._

_Summer sat down against the wall and closed her eyes. He was drunk; she could tell by the way he had said her name. 'Please don't find me," she prayed. It seemed like God wasn't on her side that night, because Neil Roberts then opened the closet door, revealing Summer crouched in the corner._

"_There you are Summer. Trying to hide are you?"_

_Summer stayed silent. She figured if she didn't disagree, maybe he wouldn't get angry. It hadn't worked other times, but there's always a first. This wasn't it. Neil grabbed his daughter by the hair and dragged her out of the closet. He threw her to the ground._

"_Daddy, please," Summer whimpered, trying to plead with him, as she did every time he was like this. That never worked either._

"_You made your mother leave you little bitch! She hated you! She never wanted you! It's your fault she left; it's your fault Bridget died!" Neil screamed at Summer and hit her across the face. Summer was used to these insults, it was always her fault. He always blamed her for things that she knew couldn't be her fault, yet he said they were. Her father pulled her back up, only to throw her back down again. This time, Summer hit her head on her dresser before hitting the floor._

She couldn't handle this anymore. Life was terrible. Seth had sailed away, Ryan had gone back to Chino and Marissa was drowning herself in self-pity. She had no-one to run to. She needed someone. She needed Seth and he wasn't here. The summer was coming to an end, and he wasn't here. She had handled this on her own for two months, and now she had reached her breaking point.

She was upset and angry. She screamed as loudly as she could. She picked up her hairbrush and threw it as hard as she could against her mirror and watched as it shattered into thousands of little pieces. She couldn't help thinking that the mirror was like her life – one second it was perfect and in an instant it can become an ugly mess. She let out another ear-piercing scream and dropped face down onto her bed. She started to cry into her pillow.

She lifted her head and looked towards the pieces of glass on the floor. She hadn't cut in years; not since she was thirteen and thought the smallest things were the end of the world. She dropped to her knees on the floor and picked up a sharp piece of her mirror. Rolling up her sleeve, she revealed a line of faint, small scars. She put the piece of mirror onto her arm, but hesitated. She held it there for a moment, not applying pressure before she took it off her arm and threw it against the wall. She wasn't going to start that again.

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It was the first day of school. Summer looked into the mirror, at the ugly gash on her cheek courtesy of Neil Roberts. She got out her make-up and began to expertly apply it, doing her best to cover up the cut. She hadn't left her room much over the summer, and she had become a lot paler and skinnier than she had been before. She stared into the mirror. School was going to be hell, but it had to be better than home.

Summer walked out the front door of her house, wearing jeans and a long-sleeved top to cover the bruises on her body. She arrived at school, and made her way over to Coop, who she saw wasn't looking much better than her. Marissa, who had always been too skinny, had gotten even thinner. She had dark circles under her eyes and her cheeks were gaunt. They didn't speak, and began walking along in silence. Summer stopped, not believing what she saw in front of her. Getting out of the back of a car was Ryan and Seth. Marissa had seen them too and was looking out in disbelief at the two boys who had begun to walk over to them.

"Summer…" Seth said softly once he had reached her.

"Cohen." Summer broke down and threw her arms around Seth, crying her eyes out as he tried to soothe her. She cried out her pain and hurt into Cohen. He was her someone. He was the one she needed.

_I tear my heart open_

_I sew myself shut_

_My weakness is_

_That I care too much_

_And my scars remind me_

_That the past is real_

_I tear my heart open_

_Just to feel…_

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	2. I Sew Myself Shut

**Disclaimer: **I don't own the O.C. or any of the songs in this story.

**Chapter 2: I Sew Myself Shut**

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She cried into his shoulder, smelling in the scent of Cohen that she had missed all summer. Her knees were shaking as she tried to keep herself standing. She could feel Cohen rubbing her back and hear him whispering soothingly into her ear. This is what she needed; her Cohen. Even though he had left her over the summer, he was back, and he was still the same sweet, lovable guy that cared so much about her. All she wanted to do was cry her eyes out to him so that he could make it all better.

Seth stroked her hair as he held her shaking body. He was feeling so guilty for leaving her now that he saw how it had affected her. He didn't know she cared that much. All he knew was that he had to talk to her, he had to make it better.

"Come on baby, let's leave," he said to the small girl, as he supported her around the waist and helped her walk towards his car. He helped her into the passenger side of the car and kissed her temple before closing her door and walking around to the other side. The drive to the Cohen's house was almost silent, the only sounds coming from a sobbing Summer. Seth had reached over to take her hand when he had climbed in the car and hadn't let go since.

Summer caught a glimpse of her reflection in the car mirror. She looked like a wreck – make-up mixed with tears streaked down her face, and the foundation she had used to cover the wound on her cheek had started to come off, making it visible.

Seth let the two into the empty Cohen mansion and led her up to his bedroom. Summer walked over to his bed and collapsed onto it, exhausted. Cohen lay down next to her, putting his arms around her and stroking her hair. She looked at him as he stared into her eyes.

"Summer… I am _so _sorry…" Seth started to apologise.

"Cohen… it's okay. It's not you-" Summer got out before she broke down in tears again, unable to continue speaking. She cuddled up against Cohen and closed her eyes.

Seth listened to her breathing as it began to regulate, then becoming steady as she drifted off to sleep. This was when Seth noticed the cut on her right cheek, visible under the foundation. He touched her face, running his fingers over the wound. Something must have happened to her to destroy this beautiful girl.

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Seth woke up to an empty bed. He looked at his clock next to him and it read 7pm. Summer was gone. Seth got out his cell phone and dialled her number. He listened to it ring three times before he got the recorded message saying that she couldn't answer the phone. He ran out to the poolhouse to find Ryan.

"Hey Ryan, have you seen Summer?" he asked.

"I saw her running down the driveway about half an hour ago."

Seth was confused. Why would she leave without saying something? She didn't have her car so she must have walked home. He couldn't help but worry about her. She was so upset when she was with him, she couldn't stop crying long enough to explain what was wrong.

Seth's thoughts were interrupted by Kirsten's calls to the boys for dinner, and the two walked into the main house.

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She half-limped, half-ran down the dark streets of Newport. She was running to the first place she thought of, the one place in the world she felt safe.

_Summer woke up happy for the first time in months. She was in Cohen's arms. She enjoyed this moment of content for a while longer, before she realised it was dark outside. Glancing at the clock, she saw it read 6:34pm. Her father returned home from drinking at 7pm exactly, and if she wasn't there he was going to be pissed off. The Cohen house was a couple of miles from hers._

_She jumped off of Seth's bed, trying not to wake him in her hurry. She ran down the stairs and out the front door, not seeing Kirsten or Sandy on her way. Anxiously, she ran down the driveway and out onto the streets._

_Summer sprinted as fast as she could to get home in time. She knew that she could never make it, but she had to try. She could see her house in the distance and glanced at her watch. 7:04pm it read. Summer reached her front door and turned the handle. Before she could push open the door, it swung back, revealing a smoking Neil Roberts._

"_Where the fuck have you been?" he asked._

"_At Marissa's," Summer lied, "I'm sorry I lost track of time."_

"_You little bitch! What did you go to her for help?" her father said, pulling her roughly inside. "She can't help you. No-one can help you because nobody loves you." Neil screamed at his daughter, punching her in the stomach. Summer doubled over in pain at the blow. _

'_Cohen loves me,' Summer told herself, trying to ignore the throbbing pain in her gut._

_Her father threw her to the ground and kicked her in the ribs. He sat on top of her so she couldn't move and punched her in the face. He took his cigarette out of his mouth and Summer screamed._

"_No daddy, please don't!" she begged, but he didn't listen and dug the burning hot cigarette into her arm. Summer yelped in pain as the tip burnt into her skin. After that, Neil seemed to get bored with causing her pain and got up to go to the liquor cabinet, leaving her crying on the floor. She heard him pour himself a glass and go into his office, taking the full bottle with him. _

_Summer saw this as her chance and got up as quickly and quietly as she could. She snuck out the front door and into the cold night air, then remembered she didn't have her car keys. Not risking going back inside for another beating, she attempted to run towards the Cohen house._

She reached to bottom of the Cohen's long driveway, stopping to catch her breath. She walked to the familiar front door and hesitated before knocking.

'What if Sandy or Kirsten answers?' she thought, 'What will they think?'

She walked away from the door and around the back to the poolhouse. She knocked on the door gently, but got no answer. Opening the door, she saw that Ryan wasn't in there, so she let herself in. Sitting on Ryan's bed, she began to cry. At least this time there was someone here for her. Someone who she could go to, instead of having to stay in the same house with her father.

She heard the poolhouse door open and Ryan came in. He looked shocked to see her in his room.

"Summer. Are you okay?" he asked.

Summer shook her head. "Can… Can you please get Cohen?" Summer choked out weakly.

Ryan nodded and went outside, returning seconds later with Seth and leaving the two alone.

"Summer!" he said as he ran into the room, surrounding her in a warm hug as she broke down again. She found her favourite spot on his shoulder as he held her close to him and kissed the top of her head. He pulled away from her and looked her in the eye.

"Shit, Summer. What the hell happened?"

Summer took a deep breath. This was it, she had to tell him. "It's… It's my d-dad. H-he… hurts me." She whispered, almost inaudibly.

Cohen let out a long sigh and looked at her bruising face. "Where else?" he asked simply, and Summer showed him the burn in her arm and lifted up her shirt, revealing her discoloured upper body. "Fuck Summer. How long has this kind of thing been happening?"

"A-all summer. Since Bridget d-died he…he's been drinking a lot and… he takes everything out on m-me."

"Oh God Summer. Did you tell anyone?"

She shook her head.

Seth pulled her back towards him. She felt safe again, the way that only he could make her feel. And now that he knew, maybe she could finally start to feel good again, like it was before.

_If you want to_

_I can save you_

_I can take you away from here_

_So lonely inside_

_So busy out there_

_And all you wanted was somebody who cares…_

_(All You Wanted – Michelle Branch)_

Hmm… I'm not happy with this chapter… What do you guys think? Please review! (I hate seeing all these hits and then like hardly any reviews…)


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